GARISSA MUSLIM CHILDREN’S HOME, GARISSA
Changing Lives for the Better
A Project of:
THE YOUNG MUSLIM ASSOCIATION
P.O. BOX 48509 – Nairobi 00100
(Kenya)
Telephone: + 254 (20) 229896
Tel/Fax: + 254 (20) 229756
Email: yma@wananchi.com
Or yma@africaonline.co.ke
Website: http://www.yma.org
YOUNG MUSLIM CHILDREN’S HOME – ESTABLISHED 1969
A Project of The Young Muslim Association
Rationale and Background
The Garissa Muslim Children’s Home is a complex complete with an Orphanage, Primary School, Secondary School, Dispensary, Agricultural and Dairy Farm and its own Water pumping and treatment system. This project affectionately referred to as “Center” and is undoubtedly the grandest project of the Young Muslim Association in collaboration with Well-wishers who includes individual donors and the Government of Kuwait and the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, have continuously responded to the rising needs of the Center by upgrading it. Today, thirty five years after its inception, the center has tremendously changed from the one room shelter to the present complex. It is impossible to trace the history of the Center without touching on the history of the country, especially in the area of relations between the colonial and the first post-colonial governments and the Kenyan Somalis who inhabit the three Districts of the North Eastern Province.
The North Eastern Province of Kenya is made up of Mandera, Wajir and Garissa Districts. Garissa where the Center is located is the Provincial Headquarters and the closest of the three Districts to Nairobi. It is a Semi-Desert area with an average temperature of 35° Celsius. With an unreliable rainfall, the weather is usually hot. Due to these climatic factors, the inhabitants of the region are nomadic pastoralists. This pastoralist lifestyle coincides with that of their neighbours (and in some cases their relatives) in Somalia to their East, Ethiopia to the North. The region also boarders the Coast Province to the South.
Between 1895-1963 the British Colonial Government Administered North Eastern Kenya in the context of the Northern Frontier District (N.F.D). The whole of the NFD most of whose inhabitants are Muslims, included besides the three Districts of Mandera, Wajir and Garissa – Marsabit and Isiolo Districts. Because of the Skirmishes that existed between the Colonial Government and the Muslim Somalis of the NFD, this part of the Country was closed to the rest of the country and the movement of the people thoroughly restricted.
As independence of Kenya from the British drew near, the Somalis of the NFD agitated for cession from Kenya with the hope of merging with their brethren in Somalia. By Independence however, this region was still a part of Kenya. The first post-Independence Government failed to establish a relationship with the NFD owing to differences from what prevailed with the Colonialists. Consequently the “Bad-blood” and the aspirations for “A grater-Somalia” climaxed into a civil war with the NFD fighters on one side and the Government soldiers on the other. This painful and destructive war dubbed the “Shifta War” was to drag on until 1968.
With climatic conditions that do not support Agriculture, the only source of income for the people being livestock ( most of which had been taken by Government soldiers), the inhabitants of the NFD were rendered destitute, while many families lost their primary bread-winners, and others were disrupted never to re-unite again.
The ensuing period of relief intervention was lead by the Catholic Church which established an early and strong presence with its establishment of “the Garissa Boys Town”. While the apparent motive of the Catholic intervention appeared to be relief and charity work, the subtle yet real motive was to win Somali converts to Christianity.
With this realisation, the local Muslim Leaders launched country-wide appeals to Muslim Well-Wishers able and willing to take care of the Orphaned and destitute children (who numbered in their hundreds) to come forward.
The Young Muslim Association though only Five years old (having been formed in 1964) responded by sending a fact-finding team to Garissa. With the recommendation of the team for urgent establishment of a child-care facility, the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home (G.M.C.H) was established in August 1969.
The first 25 boys were admitted in the temporary structure near the main Mosque in Garissa Town. The Administration of the Center was set up around it’s first Director Ibrahim Ndirangu. The Young Muslim Association officials formulated policy and sought funds for the running of the Center. Effective response to the situation demanded that as many orphaned and destitute children as needed shelter and protection at the Center were admitted. This called for more resources, primarily, which was land to set up permanent and comprehensive facilities.
With the help of Allah, the Association’s application to the Government for land was accepted and 500 acres allocated for the establishment of appropriate infra-structure that is today the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home.
Al-Hamdulillahi, despite all odds, least of which was bad roads and weather, there was sufficient support from individuals and Government Departments to see the first phase of the Center successfully completed.
In July 1973, the Center was moved to the new site, which is 4 Kilometers out of the Garissa Town. By then, the inmate population comprised 77 boys. For children with a painful past, this new secure environment was more conducive for their education and early development.
In a sentence, it can then be stated that the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home owes its beginning to external as well as internal factors. The external factor being the civil war that dispossessed the people, the response by Government to an application for land, the response by local well-wishers and the secondment by the Saudi Government of personnel. The internal factor is the vision of the Executive Committee of the Young Muslim Association and the commitment and consistence of the same Committee. To all of them who played a part- May Allah reward them, as only He knows best.
Vision
The vision of the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home is to effectively, comprehensively respond to the cry and wipe the tears of every Muslim Orphan and Destitute child in the country.
Mission
The mission of the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home is to provide an environment and facilities within which the inmates can experience love, achieve self confidence, gain education benefit from an Islamic upbringing understand and prepare to serve the Muslim Society in particular and the rest of humanity in general as enshrined in the teaching of Islam.
Goal Statement
The goal of the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home is to be a Center of excellence with the best and committed staff capable of imparting quality and relevant values to the inmates that will make them outstanding members of society.
Programmes
Pursuant to the Vision, Mission and Goal statement, the Center has pursuant an integrated approach in the Education and early development of the inmates. The children are thus exposed to the Madrassa as well as School-related training. This is the path established right from the inception of the Center in 1969. Until 1978 when the Center opened its own primary school, the inmates used to attend school out of the compound. This was to compliment the Madrassa tuition that they received in the Center.
Garissa Muslim Children’s Home Madrassa
The daily Mosque activities form part of the training of the children in the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home Madrassa. This Madrassa with an enrolment of 600 pupils (250 of whom come from outside the Centre) is run by a total of 15 teachers who instruct the children in the knowledge of: Quran, Hadith, Fiqh, Seera, Tawhid and Arabic Language. Apart from emphasizing to the children the importance of Akhlaaq, the teachers also train the children in Hifdh -Ul-Quran. The Centre has therefore entered its competent pupils in this area in both internal as well as National competitions. The Centre is now at I’daadi (Intermediate level) all the costs including the salaries of the Madrassa staff are paid for by the Association. As extra-curriculum activity in this area, the Teacher and some of their students undertake Da’wah activities outside the Centre.
Young Muslim Primary School
This school declared a Centre of excellence in Garissa District has a current enrolment of 800 pupils 450 of whom are from outside the Centre and include girls. The remaining 290 are all inmates of the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home. As indicated earlier, this school was established in 1978.
While the Young Muslim Association provided for the infrastructure and continues to equip the school and supervise it, the Government has provided the Teachers who follow the 8.4.4 Syllabus. The performance record of the school has consistently improved. In 1995 for example the second-best result from the province was scored by a pupil from the school. Young Muslim Primary School also participates in extra curriculum activities such as Drama, Games etc. The seriousness with which the school views these activities is attested to by the fact that the school holds a National Certificate in this regard.
Despite the fact that the school entered its pupils in the seven out of the 16 National schools placed allocated to Garissa District, the Association still hopes to improve the facilities at the Centre to enable and even better result.
Young Muslim Nursery School
In 1987, in response to request from the Muslim community, a Nursery school was opened at the Centre to provide and Islamic environment with which Muslim children can develop. The Nursery school follows the integrated syllabus which introduces Islamic values to the child side by side with secular knowledge.
Boarding
By the Grace of Allah, with the support of well-wishers particularly; Local Business people, Jamjoom Family of Jeddah and Africa Muslim Agency the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home now boasts four Dormitories. Dar al-Arqam and Dar-al-salaam which were constructed through local initiatives have a capacity to accommodate 90 children each. Dar-al-Jamjoom too has a capacity to accommodate 90 children and was built by the support of the Jamjoom Family while Dar-al-Abrar which was built by funding from Africa Muslim Agency of Kuwait can accommodate 120 children. While the children are accommodated in respect of their ages, they are each allocated a bed, mattress accompanying linen and a box, while at the Centre, all the wardrobe requirements of the children are catered for by the Centre. With the box the child is given school uniform, change of clothes, shoes etc. Every year, they are given shirts, Sarong’s (Kikoyi) and Kanzu (robe). The Housemasters assigned to each of the four dormitories supervise the activities of the children in their particular dormitories and monitor their academic, and disciplinary progress or otherwise of the child.
Nutrition
Through the Sadqa program, well-wishers have continued to support the Center’s commitment to the provision of a balanced and nutritious diet to the children. The Sadqa program has remained consistent since its establishment in 1972.
Medicare
In order to promote and sustain healthy conditions and environment for the child, the Association undertakes all the Medical expenses in respect of the inmates. To minimize reasons for hospital visits to only major cases the Association established a dispensary within the Center in 1988 to serve other ailments suffered by both the children and the staff. Though the Association had employed a clinical officer to man the dispensary, the cost of drugs and remuneration become prohibitive. Consultations are going on at the moment towards a viable alternative, Well- wishers are called upon to assist.
Young Muslim Association Farm Project
The project was set up in 1975 on a 150- acre plot with the goal of generating income for the Center. The dairy section currently with 28 animals has recorded tremendous success. The Agricultural section has recorded some disappointing results with the failure of its first citrus crop. Since 1993 however, new ideas have been solicited and new crops like Mangoes and Neem trees are being grown. At the moment 403 Mango trees which mature in 3 years have grown. Another 200 trees will be planted soon. With consultation with ICIPE, it was established that Neem tree which does very well in a climatic zone such as Garissa’s has medicinal value. Plans are underway to pant more Neem trees.
To facilitate irrigation, a 750 metre canal has been laid at the cost of KShs. 500,000/=. Self-sustainability and income-generation as the goal the Association holds for the Farm project, ideas and support for its improvement are continuously being sought.
Other Activities:
Besides its core-activities, the Centre also runs a bursary program for needy students, distributes Islamic Literature and Provides lecture to students in different schools within the area. The Centre also supervises and Co-ordinates teaching programs in 30 Madrassas with a teaching force of 70 teachers and a student population of 2000 children. Besides providing Text Books for use in such madrassas, the Centre also oversees syllabus preparation courses for the madrassa teachers.
With such an elevated status, the Centre also plays an active role in the Socio-political activities of the region as they relate to Islam and Muslims. These include peace missions, security issues and participation in meetings affecting the inhabitants and the country as a whole.
The Centre as the base has also received full recognition by the UNICEF as its training partner for the implementation of Islamic Integrated Education Programme in the Country. Being part of the National Children’s Caucus it has become a hub of activities for the region on United Nations Convention on the Rights of Child, the African charter on the Rights and Welfare of Child and dissemination of Information on the Children’s Act recently passed by the Parliament.
Thirty Five Years Later
Today about 1,650 students have gone through the Centre from different stages. These stages or levels range from Primary, Secondary, Colleges and finally University. A good number got absorbed into various trades and professions. What is common about them however is that they maintain touch with the Centre and Association. They make a difference wherever they are. They remember the Centre was there when they needed somebody to take them in. And above all, they pray for all those who contributed in one way or the other to give them a fresh start in life. This is no mean achievement in only thirty-five years! With their permission, we cite in this report a few of such old Boys of the Centre who now occupy important positions in the Society on Appendix 1.
These 12 have been selected to illustrate and relevance of the Centre to these young individuals as a provider of a second chance. One need not strain too much to imagine the probable other life they might have led without the intervention of the Centre.
Other Relevant Needs
If it has to live up to its Vision and Mission, the Centre must not only respond to the growing needs to anticipate them, and prepare effectively. While a competent staff of full-time professionals run the activities of the Centre under the Director, the need for constant training to keep abreast of new skills in the field of child-care remains paramount. The state of the world characterized by wars and refugees is signal to the capacity-building requirements that the Centre must address. As it has been the practice over the past 35 years, development of infrastructure is at the Center of these capacity-building needs of the Centre.
Secondary School
Al-Hamdullillah with a generous grant from the Islamic Development Bank the Secondary School Complex consisting of 4 Class Rooms, 2 Science Laboratories, 1 Computer Lab, Administration Block and Abulation Block was completed in November 2002. The School opened its doors to the first intake of 21 students in January 2003. The unique feature of the school is its syllabus which besides teaching of secular subjects also teaches Arabic and Islamic Religious Education.
Library
Though reading library facilities are currently held in two old classrooms converted into a library, a proposal is being made for a fully fledge library complete with reading and audio/visual components.
Assembly Hall
There is a need for a standard hall that will not only be used for Assemblies but for other meetings of the students as well.
Mini-Bus
That Education includes observations needs. In this respect, learning by observation is a feature of the Kenya Education Structure and includes nature trails and tours. To fully take advantage of this opportunity, the Centre requires a Mini-Bus to transport its pupils to such outings.
Girls Centre
While the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home has offered respite for Boys in difficult conditions, it has only assisted Girls in Similar condition by providing for their education up to the primary level. This assistance too is limited to those who can find shelter of their own within Garissa Town. The need for a Centre for Girls such as the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home is therefore a real one.
Additional Dormitory
Current projections show a need for another Dormitory with a capacity of 80 children.
Future Plans
The 8.4.4. System of education is geared towards developing the pupils and students in skills. While conceding that some of the inmates of Garissa Muslim Children’s Home have not performed well in their examinations for absorption into the labour force, the inability and unpreparedness of the Centre to absorb them is lamentable. It is proposed that as part of a future development strategy, the Centre considers introduction of a vocational training and skill imparting College in the compound of the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home.
Gratitude
The Centre has provided the much needed Home to the needy for the past 35 year by the Grace of Allah and the support the Association continues to receive from individuals, families and organizations both within and without the country. Both the public and the Government of the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia have supported the Centre in different projects. The office of Daawah and Irshad, Ministry of Islamic Affairs and Awqaf Saudi Arabia have seconded the services of a qualified personnel.
Africa Muslim Agency:
Since 1983 the Agency has continued to sponsor a number of the inmates of the Centre, thus giving it much needed financial support. While acknowledging the lump some donations received for specific projects and activities of the Centre, the sponsorships under the Sponsor-a-Child Scheme deserve special mention. To each of these supporters the Association wishes to record its appreciation and gratitude. Insha’Allah, Allah will surely reward those who strive on His path with Jannah.
Conclusion
If this report appears to emphasis achievements it is because it narrates the story of the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home during the past 35 years.
In terms of the Vision however, there is much to cry about. As the expenditure estimates for the next three years on Appendix 11 will indicate the current budgetary obligations are overwhelming if left to the Association alone to mobilize. The relevant needs too need looking into and funds mobilized. Yet the greatest challenge remains that of preparedness in terms of meeting the needs of all the children in difficult circumstances when such needs arise.
You Can Give Us Your Hand
Thirty five years ago, only in a dream could one imagine that the temporary shelter where the 25 boys were enrolled would become to complex the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home is today. This dream was made true by the Grace of Allah and the faith and Trust our supporters placed in us. The progress made at the Center so far justifies the dream of a bigger Centre with all the facilities necessary for the realisation of the vision of the Centre.
Sponsor-A-Child Scheme: For KShs. 2,000/= a month you will help pay the fees, provide food, clothing and textbooks to one child.
Zakaat, Sadqa and Donations paid to the Young Muslim Association only helps with the upkeep of the unsponsored children but sustain other specific projects of the Centre and general programmes of the Association.
Endowments and Legacies left to the Centre or Association guarantees self-sustainability and immortalizes the dream
For Thirty Five years children who could otherwise have died in infancy or grew up miserable and probably in a life of crime have had a second chance at this Centre. Is it not necessary that more children in similar circumstances have a place to look forward to?
Allah (S.W.T) says in the Quran:
“So gives what is due to kindred, the needy and the wayfarer, that is best for those who seek the countenance of Allah and its they who will prosper: “……………. But that which you give for charity, seeking the countenance of Allah, (will increase) it is these who will get a recompense multiplied”
The Prophet (S.A.W) has said:
“He and the care taker of (sponsor) the Orphan are like these two fingers in Janna and he pointed to his index and next finger implying that they will be side by side in Jannah.
It is in this spirit that we request you to extend your hand in co-operation and send your contribution to:
YOUNG MUSLIM ASSOCIATION OR YOUNG MUSLIM ASSOCIATION
A/C N0 35025-05 A/C NO 011328-0
HABIB BANK HABIB BANK AG ZURICH
KENYATTA AVENUE KOINANGE STREET
P.O. BOX 30673 P.O. BOX 30584
NAIROBI - (KENYA) NAIROBI
APPENDIX 1
Listed Below are Some of Garissa Muslim Children’s Home Old Boys
Ibrahim Mohamud 1974-1981 Has MSC in Environmental Education served as
a teacher, Headmaster and currently National Co-ordinator of Wildlife Clubs of Kenya.
Abdulaziz Sheikh 1972-1982 BA, MA in Journalism worked with government and currently working with British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC)
Abdisalam Sheikh Mohamed 1971-1981 Certificate in Social Work, working with Young Muslim Association as Administrator of Garissa Muslim Children’s Home – Member of Kenya Adult Education Board, Kenya Board of Mental Health and District Education Board and District Health Board and District Health Management Board.
Mohamed Aden Mahat 1974-1984: Certificate in Social Work, Awarded Presidential
Silver Star for his service to the community, Appointed 3rd Secretary Embassy of Kenya in Abu Dhabi. Currently he is the Kenyan Ambassador to Saudi Arabia.
Abdirashid Sheikh 1972-1983 BCS. Civil Engineering currently working with
Ministry of Works based at Wajir North Eastern Province.
Hajir Sharif 1969-1981 Diploma in Special Education, worked as
Headmaster of the special school for the disabled in Garissa, Currently BEd at Kenyatta University
Dagane Mohamed 1975 – 1990 BA-Journalism Al-Azhar University worked as
A Public Relation Officer-Africa Muslim Agency currently working in Saudi Arabia.
Khalif Dol 1979-1990 BA Nairobi, worked with CARE currently
Employed as a District Officer with the office of the President.
Captain Mohamed Nur Ali Joined the Kenya Army – Currently serving as Major. Now
Self employed.
Khalfan Jabir Actively involved in Youth & Daawah Programme, worked with Kenindia Assurance Co. Ltd. Dealing with Litigations, Currently working with Young Muslim Association in Youth and Dawah Department
Idle Ibrahim Ahmed Graduated with a B.Sc.(Environmental Studies) Second Class Honor Upper Division Degree from Kenyatta University . Conferred on 17th October 1997 by President of Kenya. Working with Barclays Bank of Kenya as a Country Service Manager.
Aden Guliye Yusuf Graduated with a Bachelor of Medicine and Surgery degree from University of Nairobi. Currently employed by the Ministry of Health as General Superintendent of Garissa General Hospital.
Read More...
Monday, July 17, 2006
THE YMA
THE YOUNG MUSLIM ASSOCIATION
An Organization Profile
For more than three decades the Young Muslim Association has been actively engaged in programmes and projects in the field of Education, Orphan and Child Care, Youth Development, Dawah, Relief, Water and other social welfare activities. All these accomplishments would not have been possible without the generous support of hundreds of donors and well wishers, who give their time, energy and money to change the lives of the less fortunate members of our society.
GARISSA MUSLIM CHILDRENS’ HOME HELPING ORPHANS
Garissa Muslim Children’s Home, a fully fledged institute located in Garissa, caters for the needs of Orphans, destitute and needy children. Since its inception in the early seventies, the Home has been instrumental in providing shelter food and education up to secondary level. To date over 1,600 children have gone through the system and are gainfully employed and living as respected citizens of Kenya. The current number of children at Garissa Muslim Children’s Home is 300.
CHILD CARE & DEVELOPMENT
The Association has gone a long way in reinforcing the general development of the child through CHILD FEEDING under its Duski Education programmes and has also developed in partnership with the Ministry of Education, Science and Technology and Kenya Institute of Education an Islamic Intergraded Education Programme (IIEP) which has been adopted as a component by the Ministry of Education for Pre-school-Madrassa Integration. Currently the Association is running three projects under the scheme.
YOUNG MUSLIM ASSOCIATION PRIMARY SCHOOL
Adjoining the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home, are the primary schools facilities, consisting of 16 classrooms, and administration block and playing fields. The current enrollment of the school is 970, and provides free education up to primary level.
YOUNG MUSLIM ASSOCIATION HIGH SCHOOL
Having attained self sufficiency in the primary school education and the increasing demand to provide quality secondary education within the same environment, the Association embarked on the construction of a major school project for the development of Education; the construction costs of the building was sponsored by the Islamic Development Bank. The Construction work was completed in November 2002 and the first intake of Form one structure started in January 2003.
NAKURU ISLAMIC CENTRE
A fully-fledged project dedicated to the Hifz-Ul-Qur’an Programme. To date, 36 boys have memorized the Holy Qur’an and are taking higher Islamic Studies in various institutions. Currently, 24 boarding and 11 day students are undergoing the vigorous training.
ISLAMIC RELIGIOUS EDUCATION
A project to provide Islamic Religious Education to students in Government Primary and Secondary Schools in Kenya. The Young Muslim Association is meeting the salaries of numerous teachers under this programme, however considering the gigantic nature of this project and the financial involvement, the Young Muslim Association appeals to all people of good will for their generous support.
PUBLISHING
In addition to the books for the teaching of IRE, the Young Muslim Association also publishes regularly Islamic pamphlets, handouts and booklets in various local languages and dialects currently it is also involved in the translation of Islamic works from English to Kiswahili.
MADRASSAS
The need to impart religious education to our children remains an ardent task of the Association. Some 75 Madrassa teachers are supported in the rural and underprivileged communities of Kenya. Without this assistance hundreds of Muslim children will remain deprived of basic Islamic knowledge.
EDUCATIONAL BURSARIES
Northern part of Kenya which is predominantly Muslim inhabited lives in abject poverty. To alleviate the suffering of poverty stricken students in secondary schools and colleges, the Association provides financial assistance to many deserving cases to facilitate them complete their education.
TRAINING YOUTH
To train Youth, the Association organizes seminars and training workshops and supports the efforts of Muslim students groups in the universities, colleges and schools. Hundred of Youth have thus been saved from going astray and lead the Islamic way of life. The Association also conducts Counselling and Career guidance programmes for Form 4 students – Has conducted Youth seminars on creating awareness on HIV / AIDS, Drug Abuse and Child Abuse.
SOCIAL WELFARE
This is a vast and very elaborate program under which the following activities are carried out: -
Regular assistance to poor, needy and wayfarers
Regular assistance to widows in slums and poor areas
Monthly rations to the OLD LADIES HOME in Pumwani
Water development programs in the ASAL areas; i.e. Sinking of shallow wells, installing hand and mechanic pumps.
Distribution of emergency relief in drought affected areas.
Organizing IFTAR & SIYAM programmes in poor rural areas.
Collection and distribution of Zakat Ul Fitr
Organize udhuya (Qurbani) programme during the month of Zul Hija
NATIONAL INITIATIVES
The Association participates at National Forums/committees to sensitize and create awareness on various issues as they affect the members of the Muslim Community.
The Association participated in drafting the amendments to the Children’s Bill.
Developed memorandum on Laws related to Women.
Member of the Drafting Team which prepared the first Kenya Country report on the Convention on the Rights of Children.
Member of the Caucus on the Affirmative Action and Gender Equality Bill.
Member of the Education Emergency Response Committee, Ministry of Education, Science and Technology, UNICEF/UNESCO.
Executive Board member of Kenya Alliance for the Advancement of Children and the National Children’s Caucus.
Member of the Elimu Yetu Coalition.
Appointed Member on the Task Force on Legal Issues Relating to HIV/AIDS by the Attorney General - 1999 to 2000.
Founder member of Pastoralist Childrens Education Caucus – Now under Arid Land Management.
Executive Committee Member of National Council of NGOs.
REGISTRATION
1964 – First Registered under the SOCIETIES ACT NO. 1441
1993 – Registered under the NGO CO-ORDINATION ACT NO. OP.218/051/9396/125
PIN NO: P000607212K Read More...
An Organization Profile
For more than three decades the Young Muslim Association has been actively engaged in programmes and projects in the field of Education, Orphan and Child Care, Youth Development, Dawah, Relief, Water and other social welfare activities. All these accomplishments would not have been possible without the generous support of hundreds of donors and well wishers, who give their time, energy and money to change the lives of the less fortunate members of our society.
GARISSA MUSLIM CHILDRENS’ HOME HELPING ORPHANS
Garissa Muslim Children’s Home, a fully fledged institute located in Garissa, caters for the needs of Orphans, destitute and needy children. Since its inception in the early seventies, the Home has been instrumental in providing shelter food and education up to secondary level. To date over 1,600 children have gone through the system and are gainfully employed and living as respected citizens of Kenya. The current number of children at Garissa Muslim Children’s Home is 300.
CHILD CARE & DEVELOPMENT
The Association has gone a long way in reinforcing the general development of the child through CHILD FEEDING under its Duski Education programmes and has also developed in partnership with the Ministry of Education, Science and Technology and Kenya Institute of Education an Islamic Intergraded Education Programme (IIEP) which has been adopted as a component by the Ministry of Education for Pre-school-Madrassa Integration. Currently the Association is running three projects under the scheme.
YOUNG MUSLIM ASSOCIATION PRIMARY SCHOOL
Adjoining the Garissa Muslim Children’s Home, are the primary schools facilities, consisting of 16 classrooms, and administration block and playing fields. The current enrollment of the school is 970, and provides free education up to primary level.
YOUNG MUSLIM ASSOCIATION HIGH SCHOOL
Having attained self sufficiency in the primary school education and the increasing demand to provide quality secondary education within the same environment, the Association embarked on the construction of a major school project for the development of Education; the construction costs of the building was sponsored by the Islamic Development Bank. The Construction work was completed in November 2002 and the first intake of Form one structure started in January 2003.
NAKURU ISLAMIC CENTRE
A fully-fledged project dedicated to the Hifz-Ul-Qur’an Programme. To date, 36 boys have memorized the Holy Qur’an and are taking higher Islamic Studies in various institutions. Currently, 24 boarding and 11 day students are undergoing the vigorous training.
ISLAMIC RELIGIOUS EDUCATION
A project to provide Islamic Religious Education to students in Government Primary and Secondary Schools in Kenya. The Young Muslim Association is meeting the salaries of numerous teachers under this programme, however considering the gigantic nature of this project and the financial involvement, the Young Muslim Association appeals to all people of good will for their generous support.
PUBLISHING
In addition to the books for the teaching of IRE, the Young Muslim Association also publishes regularly Islamic pamphlets, handouts and booklets in various local languages and dialects currently it is also involved in the translation of Islamic works from English to Kiswahili.
MADRASSAS
The need to impart religious education to our children remains an ardent task of the Association. Some 75 Madrassa teachers are supported in the rural and underprivileged communities of Kenya. Without this assistance hundreds of Muslim children will remain deprived of basic Islamic knowledge.
EDUCATIONAL BURSARIES
Northern part of Kenya which is predominantly Muslim inhabited lives in abject poverty. To alleviate the suffering of poverty stricken students in secondary schools and colleges, the Association provides financial assistance to many deserving cases to facilitate them complete their education.
TRAINING YOUTH
To train Youth, the Association organizes seminars and training workshops and supports the efforts of Muslim students groups in the universities, colleges and schools. Hundred of Youth have thus been saved from going astray and lead the Islamic way of life. The Association also conducts Counselling and Career guidance programmes for Form 4 students – Has conducted Youth seminars on creating awareness on HIV / AIDS, Drug Abuse and Child Abuse.
SOCIAL WELFARE
This is a vast and very elaborate program under which the following activities are carried out: -
Regular assistance to poor, needy and wayfarers
Regular assistance to widows in slums and poor areas
Monthly rations to the OLD LADIES HOME in Pumwani
Water development programs in the ASAL areas; i.e. Sinking of shallow wells, installing hand and mechanic pumps.
Distribution of emergency relief in drought affected areas.
Organizing IFTAR & SIYAM programmes in poor rural areas.
Collection and distribution of Zakat Ul Fitr
Organize udhuya (Qurbani) programme during the month of Zul Hija
NATIONAL INITIATIVES
The Association participates at National Forums/committees to sensitize and create awareness on various issues as they affect the members of the Muslim Community.
The Association participated in drafting the amendments to the Children’s Bill.
Developed memorandum on Laws related to Women.
Member of the Drafting Team which prepared the first Kenya Country report on the Convention on the Rights of Children.
Member of the Caucus on the Affirmative Action and Gender Equality Bill.
Member of the Education Emergency Response Committee, Ministry of Education, Science and Technology, UNICEF/UNESCO.
Executive Board member of Kenya Alliance for the Advancement of Children and the National Children’s Caucus.
Member of the Elimu Yetu Coalition.
Appointed Member on the Task Force on Legal Issues Relating to HIV/AIDS by the Attorney General - 1999 to 2000.
Founder member of Pastoralist Childrens Education Caucus – Now under Arid Land Management.
Executive Committee Member of National Council of NGOs.
REGISTRATION
1964 – First Registered under the SOCIETIES ACT NO. 1441
1993 – Registered under the NGO CO-ORDINATION ACT NO. OP.218/051/9396/125
PIN NO: P000607212K Read More...
Monday, January 9, 2006
Building a Child's Self Esteem
Building a Child's Self Esteem
"O ye people! Worship your guardian Lord, Who created you and those before you that ye may become righteous." Quran 2:21
Family Life Question: "Children frequently express feelings of not being liked by other children and not being able to do things before making an attempt. What are some ways to encourage self-confidence in children?"
Dear Parents:
Children who are morally and spiritually conscience develop a sense of their own self-worth. Helping our children develop healthy self-esteem is one of the most important things that parents can do for them; it is the foundation of their faith and commitment to Allah. Children need to be assured that they are a special gift from Allah and they are to dedicate their talents and resources to Thy service--this gives them value, purpose and direction for life. Through every phase of a child's development, they need provisions for moral and spiritual enrichment that encourages them to truly reverence Allah and to thus value the beauty in themselves."We have indeed created man in the best of molds." (Quran 95:4) There is no fault in Allah's creation; to man, Allah gave the purest and best nature. Our duty is to preserve, and nurture the distinctive character that Allah has created.
Healthy feelings about oneself or high self-esteem is best started in the home, and this needs to be cultivated in our children from birth. Thankfulness for who Allah has made us to be is based primarily on how our parents or guardians view us. Children mirror others' perception of them; they measure themselves by the standards set by those shaping their lives. A child needs our unconditional love. While we may show disapproval of wrong actions, the child still needs to feel cherished. We are guided: "...truly no one despairs of Allah's soothing Mercy, except those who have no faith." (Quran 12:87) Our unconditional compassion for our children will promote and encourage their faith in Allah and instill the thinking that "I am lovable, I am confident."
Persons with healthy self-esteem are more capable of making decisions; they exhibit thankfulness for their accomplishments, are willing to take responsibility, and are better able to cope with stressful situations. They meet and feel enthusiastic about challenges. Often a student with a high IQ and low self-esteem will do poorly in school, while a child with average ability and high self-esteem will excel. The thinking that is cultivated in a person in the early years affects his entire life.
The National PTA along with the March of Dimes has developed a program called "Parenting: The Underdeveloped Skill" to help parents learn to better communicate with their children and to nurture their youngster's self-esteem. Some steps they outline include: "
1. Showing kids how to communicate their feelings, openly and honestly, is a good place for parents to start. Children need to know that even anger and fear are to be appropriately expressed rather than bottled up. Because children learn by example, parents must let their feelings be known.
2. Listening--truly listening to children is a second key to developing good self-esteem. Having parents listen not only enhances children's good feeling about themselves, it also teaches them...(to be caring).
3. Teaching how to get along with others through negotiation and compromise is important.
4. Establishing fair, consistent discipline is one of the other building blocks of good self-esteem.
5. Giving children responsibilities--tasks that are meaningful and 'do-able' and that they can be accountable for also builds self-esteem.
6. Permitting children to make decisions (even an occasional wrong one) helps them learn good judgment.
7. Keeping a sense of humor is important. It can work wonders and helps children keep perspective on what is important.
8. Treating children lovingly, with both respect and courtesy, helps children learn that they are beautiful and worthwhile people. Parents, treat them the way you yourself want to be treated." The Parenting: The Underdeveloped Skill kit is available through the Chicago office of the National PTA.
When we build a warm and friendly relationship with our children, we establish the best opportunity for imparting strong moral and spiritual values to them--the key to high self-esteem.
Read More...
Monday, July 18, 2005
The Positive & Negative C's of Islamic Parenting
by Shahina Siddiqui
One of the greatest challenges a Muslim will ever face is being a parent. This is one challenge, however, many of us are least prepared for.
Allah tells us in the Quran that our children are our trial and as such we should take the task of parenting seriously, and start learning from each other. In my experience in dealing with my own family and counseling other Muslim families, a model has developed based on what I call "The Positive and Negative C's". I pray to Allah that this humble contribution will help parents and children alike in diagnosing and repairing the health of their families.
POSITIVE C'S
Compassion (Rehmat)
Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) stated, "He is not of us who does not have compassion for his fellow beings".
It is interesting to note that when it comes to Hadith like this or Quranic quotes dealing with human behavior, we never stop to think that our children and family members are also our fellow human beings and that these golden rules must also be applied to them.
Compassion is only one component of the concept of mercy (Rehmat) — the others being kindness, respect, and of course love. Remember the displeasure of Prophet Muhammad when a Bedouin told him how he had never kissed any of his ten children.
Consultation (Shura)
The Prophet has related that Allah says "Oh My servant. I look on high handedness as something not permissible for myself, and I have forbidden it for you. So do not oppress each other".
When we consult with each other in the domestic realm, both husband and wife must show respect for each other. This is one of the best ways to bond and to learn to listen to each other and to resolve conflicts. However, the consultation will only be fruitful if it is sincere and not merely a formality. Imposition of one's ideas with scant regard to the welfare of the whole family unit defeats the purpose of the most important Quranic principle of Shura.
Cooperation
This concept of cooperation in Islam is most beautifully illustrated in Sura Al-Asr: "… counsel each other to the truth (Haq), and counsel each other to patience and fortitude (Sabr)".
When a family unit cooperates in this manner, they truly capture the spirit of Islam — the welfare of each member of the family becomes the concern of the other.
Commitment
It is extremely important that our families commit themselves as a unit to Allah and His Prophet(s): "Obey Allah and His Prophet and those in authority over you" (Nisa). This collective commitment gives us an identity and maps out our purpose — namely that we all belong to Allah and are accountable and responsible to Him.
Communication
Communication is more than talking. It is an essential part of family life. It is both talking in a manner in which others can understand you, and hearing in a manner in which you can listen and understand others.
So many times people claim that they have no communication problem since they are always talking. However, the majority of the time they are talking "at" and not talking "to". This mode usually results in the recipient tuning out. Many children at an early age learn to tune out their parents.
When communication is a means to listening, understanding, and exchanging ideas, it is the most powerful tool to effective parenting and the best shield against peer and societal pressures.
It also teaches children skills to problem solving. An important component of positive communication is a sense of humor when parents and children can laugh together. Communication can also be instrumental in passing down family history and thus creating oneness and togetherness by sharing a mutual heritage (children love to hear about family stories).
Consistency
Effective parenting requires that we are consistent in our value judgments, discipline, and moral standards. Many parents inadvertently apply double standards to boys and girls when it comes to social behavior and domestic chores. This is unacceptable, and leads to sibling rivalry and stereotypical males and females.
Confidentiality
Family is with whom we can feel safe and secure. Where we know our secrets are safe and where there is mutual trust. Unfortunately, parents often betray the trust of their children when they discuss their concerns, which they confide in them to outsiders. This leads to mistrust, and sooner or later our children will stop confiding in us. This may take them to find confidants outside the family, sometimes non-Muslim peers, and this can be detrimental to their spiritual and moral growth.
Contentment (Tawakkul)
The greatest gift we can give our children is that of contentment. This can be developed very early in life by encouraging our children to give thanks to Allah for all they have by discouraging materialism by word and example, and by counting the blessings every night and remembering the less fortunate.
Confidence
It is the duty of parents to build confidence in our children through encouragement and honest and sincere praise. By developing confidence, we give our children the courage to stand up for themselves and their beliefs and to be able to deal with opposition.
Control
By teaching restraint and avoiding excess we develop in our children control so that they do not become slaves to their desires (Nafs).
Calm
By encouraging and showing calm in matters of adversity and in times of panic we improve our Taqwa (God consciousness) and teach our children to rely on Allah and to turn to Allah alone for all needs.
Courage
Courage of conviction can only be achieved when we have been able to teach our children true Islam. We should take advantage of every learning opportunity as a family so that our faith (Iman) flourishes and evolves towards Ihsan as a family unit. In this manner we can be a source of strength to each other.
Critical Thinking
The Quran encourages us over and over again to think, reflect, ponder, understand and analyze. However, very rarely do. Parents must encourage children to ask questions. Our response to difficult inquiries from our children is to say "do it because I said so". This discourages the children from developing critical thinking. They become lazy and complacent and easy prey to cult type following. To take things at face value makes us vulnerable.
Charitable
The most important attitude of a Muslim personality is, as Prophet Muhammad stated : "Do you not wish that Allah will forgive you? Then forgive your brothers and sisters". Many relationships break because people are not able to forgive each other. It is important that parents make up in front of their children by forgiving each other after an argument. Prophet Muhammad stated, "Like for your brother what you like for yourself". So if husband and
wife expect respect from each other they should give respect.
A charitable nature also encourages us to overlook people with their shortcomings and to be sensitive and to have empathy.
NEGATIVE C'S
There are many negative C's, which should also be identified so that we can avoid them or at least be aware of them. As you will notice when you go through the whole exercise, the presence of one negative C cancels out a positive C.
Competition
In an authentic Hadith the Prophet Muhammad said: "Look up to one who is greater in piety so you strive to be like him and look upon one who is below you in material status so that you may be thankful to Allah's Grace".
As a Muslim community we are experiencing the opposite. We are literally killing ourselves to gain bigger and better material goods than others and passing this same competitive spirit to our children.
If Br. X's son is going to Yale, my son must go to Harvard otherwise he is a failure, no matter how good a Mumin (believer) he is in comparison to Br. X's son. We are inadvertently putting so much pressure on our children to compete in Dunya (this world) that we are actually hurting their self-esteem and pushing them away. Remember if children don't find acceptance of who they are and what they are capable of at home, they will find it elsewhere.
Comparison
Comparison is an outcome of negative competition it is cruel and breeds resentment and anger. Many parents compare their children to others and get in the habit of complaining. Grass always seems greener in the neighbor's yard, but closer inspection may reveal the opposite. None of us are perfect, and therefore we should stop looking for perfection in others.
Control
The negative aspect of control shows in the form of a controlling personality e.g. I am the boss so you do as I tell you. In extreme cases this need to control leads to abuse and neglect. Anger is also a weapon of a control freak. In most cases it is the father, however mothers also exhibit this trait.
Criticism
Constant, destructive criticism is a sign of dysfunctional parenting. Continuous put downs and verbal clashing destroys the tranquil atmosphere at home. The self-esteem of the recipients of this criticism is extremely low developing in them a victim mentality. They will either seek abusive relationships or turn their backs on their families. Many runaways come from such a family background.
Corruption
"If the truth was to follow their whims, the heaven and earth and all their inhabitants would be corrupt" (Quran part of 23:71).
Weak Nafs and diseases of the heart lead to poor character, which of course is the result of grudging submission and conditional faith. When we corrupt our Deen (religion) by picking and
choosing what we want, practicing what suits us best and resisting and outright opposing what does not suit our fancy, we pay an enormous price by losing ourselves to the Dunya, and driving our children away from Islam.
Confusion
Parents are confused about their identity and their values. They have not been able to develop a structure of right and wrong based on Quran and Hadith and as such when it comes to implementation give conflicting signals to their children.
We must as parents develop an Islamic frame of reference, which would serve to develop a Muslim conscience in our children and a basis for judgment. Sifting through our cultural baggage and increasing our knowledge can only achieve this.
Contempt
Contempt for others is a result of pride, arrogance, and conceit. We must discourage arrogance in children and be constantly vigilant about it as many Muslim youth are falling prey to this trait and developing contempt towards their parents. It is one thing to praise and quite another to set them up on a pedestal. We should always remember "knowledge is proud it knows so much — wisdom is humble it knows no more".
Consumerism
Consumption, a vice of this society, is creeping into Muslim communities. When wants become needs, and parents start compensating for their lack of time spent with their children with material gifts, we are perpetuating consumerism — anything can be bought. This, however, is not true. So many young people I counsel always say "I could do without this new computer if only my parents would spend more time with me".
The legacy of materialism survives generations since it caters to our baser self. Please watch out for it.
Contradiction
When there is contradiction in word and deed it is called hypocrisy. Children are very sensitive to this vice and can pick a hypocrite a mile away.
When we behave holier than thou in the Masjid but present a different side in other settings, we are giving our children the message it is okay to be a hypocrite.
Carelessness
As Prophet Muhammad reminded us in his last sermon "Shaytan cannot mislead us in major issues of Faith but in minor issues". This is where our carelessness and lack of diligence can lead to weak character.
Colonization
This is a mind set that many immigrant parents have passed down to their children — a sense of inferiority, a complex as such, that European and Western cultures are superior and better than that of their country of origin. This is a mentality that encourages imitation, following and serving rather than leadership.
There are many more positive and negative C's that I could discuss but perhaps it would be entertaining if families could sit together and see how many they can come up with, and perform a diagnostic test of their own families based on this humble contribution.
Read More...
One of the greatest challenges a Muslim will ever face is being a parent. This is one challenge, however, many of us are least prepared for.
Allah tells us in the Quran that our children are our trial and as such we should take the task of parenting seriously, and start learning from each other. In my experience in dealing with my own family and counseling other Muslim families, a model has developed based on what I call "The Positive and Negative C's". I pray to Allah that this humble contribution will help parents and children alike in diagnosing and repairing the health of their families.
POSITIVE C'S
Compassion (Rehmat)
Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) stated, "He is not of us who does not have compassion for his fellow beings".
It is interesting to note that when it comes to Hadith like this or Quranic quotes dealing with human behavior, we never stop to think that our children and family members are also our fellow human beings and that these golden rules must also be applied to them.
Compassion is only one component of the concept of mercy (Rehmat) — the others being kindness, respect, and of course love. Remember the displeasure of Prophet Muhammad when a Bedouin told him how he had never kissed any of his ten children.
Consultation (Shura)
The Prophet has related that Allah says "Oh My servant. I look on high handedness as something not permissible for myself, and I have forbidden it for you. So do not oppress each other".
When we consult with each other in the domestic realm, both husband and wife must show respect for each other. This is one of the best ways to bond and to learn to listen to each other and to resolve conflicts. However, the consultation will only be fruitful if it is sincere and not merely a formality. Imposition of one's ideas with scant regard to the welfare of the whole family unit defeats the purpose of the most important Quranic principle of Shura.
Cooperation
This concept of cooperation in Islam is most beautifully illustrated in Sura Al-Asr: "… counsel each other to the truth (Haq), and counsel each other to patience and fortitude (Sabr)".
When a family unit cooperates in this manner, they truly capture the spirit of Islam — the welfare of each member of the family becomes the concern of the other.
Commitment
It is extremely important that our families commit themselves as a unit to Allah and His Prophet(s): "Obey Allah and His Prophet and those in authority over you" (Nisa). This collective commitment gives us an identity and maps out our purpose — namely that we all belong to Allah and are accountable and responsible to Him.
Communication
Communication is more than talking. It is an essential part of family life. It is both talking in a manner in which others can understand you, and hearing in a manner in which you can listen and understand others.
So many times people claim that they have no communication problem since they are always talking. However, the majority of the time they are talking "at" and not talking "to". This mode usually results in the recipient tuning out. Many children at an early age learn to tune out their parents.
When communication is a means to listening, understanding, and exchanging ideas, it is the most powerful tool to effective parenting and the best shield against peer and societal pressures.
It also teaches children skills to problem solving. An important component of positive communication is a sense of humor when parents and children can laugh together. Communication can also be instrumental in passing down family history and thus creating oneness and togetherness by sharing a mutual heritage (children love to hear about family stories).
Consistency
Effective parenting requires that we are consistent in our value judgments, discipline, and moral standards. Many parents inadvertently apply double standards to boys and girls when it comes to social behavior and domestic chores. This is unacceptable, and leads to sibling rivalry and stereotypical males and females.
Confidentiality
Family is with whom we can feel safe and secure. Where we know our secrets are safe and where there is mutual trust. Unfortunately, parents often betray the trust of their children when they discuss their concerns, which they confide in them to outsiders. This leads to mistrust, and sooner or later our children will stop confiding in us. This may take them to find confidants outside the family, sometimes non-Muslim peers, and this can be detrimental to their spiritual and moral growth.
Contentment (Tawakkul)
The greatest gift we can give our children is that of contentment. This can be developed very early in life by encouraging our children to give thanks to Allah for all they have by discouraging materialism by word and example, and by counting the blessings every night and remembering the less fortunate.
Confidence
It is the duty of parents to build confidence in our children through encouragement and honest and sincere praise. By developing confidence, we give our children the courage to stand up for themselves and their beliefs and to be able to deal with opposition.
Control
By teaching restraint and avoiding excess we develop in our children control so that they do not become slaves to their desires (Nafs).
Calm
By encouraging and showing calm in matters of adversity and in times of panic we improve our Taqwa (God consciousness) and teach our children to rely on Allah and to turn to Allah alone for all needs.
Courage
Courage of conviction can only be achieved when we have been able to teach our children true Islam. We should take advantage of every learning opportunity as a family so that our faith (Iman) flourishes and evolves towards Ihsan as a family unit. In this manner we can be a source of strength to each other.
Critical Thinking
The Quran encourages us over and over again to think, reflect, ponder, understand and analyze. However, very rarely do. Parents must encourage children to ask questions. Our response to difficult inquiries from our children is to say "do it because I said so". This discourages the children from developing critical thinking. They become lazy and complacent and easy prey to cult type following. To take things at face value makes us vulnerable.
Charitable
The most important attitude of a Muslim personality is, as Prophet Muhammad stated : "Do you not wish that Allah will forgive you? Then forgive your brothers and sisters". Many relationships break because people are not able to forgive each other. It is important that parents make up in front of their children by forgiving each other after an argument. Prophet Muhammad stated, "Like for your brother what you like for yourself". So if husband and
wife expect respect from each other they should give respect.
A charitable nature also encourages us to overlook people with their shortcomings and to be sensitive and to have empathy.
NEGATIVE C'S
There are many negative C's, which should also be identified so that we can avoid them or at least be aware of them. As you will notice when you go through the whole exercise, the presence of one negative C cancels out a positive C.
Competition
In an authentic Hadith the Prophet Muhammad said: "Look up to one who is greater in piety so you strive to be like him and look upon one who is below you in material status so that you may be thankful to Allah's Grace".
As a Muslim community we are experiencing the opposite. We are literally killing ourselves to gain bigger and better material goods than others and passing this same competitive spirit to our children.
If Br. X's son is going to Yale, my son must go to Harvard otherwise he is a failure, no matter how good a Mumin (believer) he is in comparison to Br. X's son. We are inadvertently putting so much pressure on our children to compete in Dunya (this world) that we are actually hurting their self-esteem and pushing them away. Remember if children don't find acceptance of who they are and what they are capable of at home, they will find it elsewhere.
Comparison
Comparison is an outcome of negative competition it is cruel and breeds resentment and anger. Many parents compare their children to others and get in the habit of complaining. Grass always seems greener in the neighbor's yard, but closer inspection may reveal the opposite. None of us are perfect, and therefore we should stop looking for perfection in others.
Control
The negative aspect of control shows in the form of a controlling personality e.g. I am the boss so you do as I tell you. In extreme cases this need to control leads to abuse and neglect. Anger is also a weapon of a control freak. In most cases it is the father, however mothers also exhibit this trait.
Criticism
Constant, destructive criticism is a sign of dysfunctional parenting. Continuous put downs and verbal clashing destroys the tranquil atmosphere at home. The self-esteem of the recipients of this criticism is extremely low developing in them a victim mentality. They will either seek abusive relationships or turn their backs on their families. Many runaways come from such a family background.
Corruption
"If the truth was to follow their whims, the heaven and earth and all their inhabitants would be corrupt" (Quran part of 23:71).
Weak Nafs and diseases of the heart lead to poor character, which of course is the result of grudging submission and conditional faith. When we corrupt our Deen (religion) by picking and
choosing what we want, practicing what suits us best and resisting and outright opposing what does not suit our fancy, we pay an enormous price by losing ourselves to the Dunya, and driving our children away from Islam.
Confusion
Parents are confused about their identity and their values. They have not been able to develop a structure of right and wrong based on Quran and Hadith and as such when it comes to implementation give conflicting signals to their children.
We must as parents develop an Islamic frame of reference, which would serve to develop a Muslim conscience in our children and a basis for judgment. Sifting through our cultural baggage and increasing our knowledge can only achieve this.
Contempt
Contempt for others is a result of pride, arrogance, and conceit. We must discourage arrogance in children and be constantly vigilant about it as many Muslim youth are falling prey to this trait and developing contempt towards their parents. It is one thing to praise and quite another to set them up on a pedestal. We should always remember "knowledge is proud it knows so much — wisdom is humble it knows no more".
Consumerism
Consumption, a vice of this society, is creeping into Muslim communities. When wants become needs, and parents start compensating for their lack of time spent with their children with material gifts, we are perpetuating consumerism — anything can be bought. This, however, is not true. So many young people I counsel always say "I could do without this new computer if only my parents would spend more time with me".
The legacy of materialism survives generations since it caters to our baser self. Please watch out for it.
Contradiction
When there is contradiction in word and deed it is called hypocrisy. Children are very sensitive to this vice and can pick a hypocrite a mile away.
When we behave holier than thou in the Masjid but present a different side in other settings, we are giving our children the message it is okay to be a hypocrite.
Carelessness
As Prophet Muhammad reminded us in his last sermon "Shaytan cannot mislead us in major issues of Faith but in minor issues". This is where our carelessness and lack of diligence can lead to weak character.
Colonization
This is a mind set that many immigrant parents have passed down to their children — a sense of inferiority, a complex as such, that European and Western cultures are superior and better than that of their country of origin. This is a mentality that encourages imitation, following and serving rather than leadership.
There are many more positive and negative C's that I could discuss but perhaps it would be entertaining if families could sit together and see how many they can come up with, and perform a diagnostic test of their own families based on this humble contribution.
Read More...
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